


Like Real People Do

by sinkingtowns



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Anyways, Beast Titan - Freeform, Canon Compliant, Comfort/Angst, Fix-It, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, One Shot, Return to Shiganshina Arc (Shingeki no Kyojin), Return to Shiganshina Arc Spoilers (Shingeki no Kyojin), bc i wanted more and they didn't give it to us :eyeroll:, it's basically a continuation of that scene from s3 ep16, of sorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:53:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27863373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinkingtowns/pseuds/sinkingtowns
Summary: It was everything—an apology, a thank you, a scream, a sigh. It was goodbye.
Relationships: Levi & Erwin Smith, Levi/Erwin Smith
Comments: 19
Kudos: 116





	Like Real People Do

_“You’ve fought well. It’s all thanks to you that we’ve come this far. I’m making the choice. Give up on your dream and die. Lead the recruits straight into hell. I will take down the Beast Titan.”_

Levi’s words hung heavy amidst the bitter scent of blood and gunpowder. The shuddering sobs of soldiers were sharp on the wind, drifting across the remains of Shiganshina's outer towns. Floating along with them was a suffocating sense of dread—how its quiet fingers wove through the troops, leaving nothing but despair in its path, tracing all the way back to its source: the Beast Titan. He stood eerily quiet, patient fields and fields away. Still, his presence loomed over the Survey Corps, pressing closer, _closer_ , as dust cascaded down Wall Maria.

Crouched at Erwin’s feet, Levi looked up to where his commander was perched on a crate, eyebrows knit deep in thought. His blue eyes clouded over as he considered what had just been said.

The irony was cruel, facing Erwin for the final time just as he had the first. Levi could almost feel the world sneering in his face. Back then, it was out of spite—crumpled to his knees, blood staining his teeth, glowering up at the man who stood between him and freedom. Now, it was out of respect, out of a terrible, terrible desire to be doing this at a different time, at a different place.

Levi’s stomach rolled as he watched the weight of his words finally crash down on Erwin.

It was slow—so slow that if anyone else was watching him, they wouldn’t have noticed. But the map of Erwin’s face was engraved in Levi’s mind. He had every inch of him memorized, from the constellation of freckles on his back to every tick of his hands. So he noticed as Erwin’s face softened and a shadow of a smile grazed his lips. A fucking smile.

"Levi." Erwin’s voice was raw, and Levi forced himself to meet his eyes. "Thank you.”

He looked different. Beneath the dirt and blood, Erwin _was_ different. The obsession that held him down was gone, replaced by something new. _Humanity_ , Levi realised. After a life of self-demonization at the hands of a dream that didn’t even belong to him, he was human once more. The thought made Levi’s chest tight.

He rose to his feet and Erwin’s gaze followed. “For what?” he scoffed, “I just told you to go kill yourself.”

They both knew he didn’t mean it. For all he was worth, not even in Erwin’s last moments could Levi give him what he deserved. More words bubbled up in the back of his throat, only to die just as quickly. Instead, he tore his stare downward once again, suddenly interested in picking at the cuffs on his jacket.

Buried between the chaotic shouts and cries was the faint rustling of canvas. Levi stood with eyes downcast, pretending not to take notice as the sound of gravel crunching underfoot grew louder. Erwin’s feet slid to a stop between his.

Time passed. Or it didn’t. Levi’s breath hitched as Erwin brushed his hand along his jaw. Slowly, carefully, as if trying not to scare off an animal, Erwin tilted his head up. Levi leaned into the familiarity of the touch, the rough calluses of his hand, the warmth. With effort, he met Erwin’s eyes.

“For setting me free.”

The burden of the basement was gone, and in its place something tender and raw. Not the inhumane commander with a death wish, or the man hellbent on following his father’s dream, or the one responsible for legions of dead soldiers. No, Erwin just _was_.

Levi twisted his head to plant a kiss on the delicate skin of Erwin’s wrist. It was all he could muster for a response, unable to speak past the thickness in his throat. He had never been good with words, anyway.

And Erwin never minded.

He kissed him. Ran a finger along Levi’s chin, pushing his hand to the base of his neck. Levi grabbed a fistful of Erwin’s jacket with one hand, cupping his cheek with the other. The taste of blood and ash and something like melancholy was bitter on his tongue, but he savored all of it nevertheless.

It was everything—an apology, a thank you, a scream, a sigh. It was goodbye.

Levi let his hands drift through Erwin’s hair, feeling, feeling, _feeling_. He pushed closer until no space was left between them. There was no word—no words—that could describe the intensity that clung to his bones, a sensation so big and full that it ached. All he wanted was to hold Erwin, to pull him tighter and tighter and to never let go.

Erwin broke away first, resting his forehead against Levi’s, breath slow and steady. Levi stood just as motionless, eyes closed. He eased as Erwin reached up to stroke his cheek once more, only this time his hand came away slick and salty. Was he crying? He hadn’t done so in such a long time—God, had he _ever_?—that the sensation felt forgein. Like the tears drying on his face had been placed there by someone else.

For a moment, there was nothing. The air stilled, as if for once the world was willing to comply with his wishes. Then the rocks came, tearing across the abandoned houses and smashing into the wall. Maria groaned as more pieces of herself crumbled away; soldiers did the same. What was left of the horses whined in fear—one unfortunate creature running out into the waiting arms of the beast.

Forehead still pressed against Erwin’s, Levi mumbled, “I should’ve broken your legs when I had the chance.”

Erwin shifted under Levi’s hands. Levi lifted his head, running a thumb along Erwin’s bottom lip as he did so. And there it was. There was that fucking smile.

“I love you, Levi.”

There was a time when those words would have done more harm than good. When Levi would have swallowed hard and dropped his eyes, said something cynical or defensive. It still hurt him, in some strange, unnamed way, but the feeling was almost welcome. The pain felt earned. Satisfying.

He gently tugged Erwin’s head down to press a final chaste kiss on the bridge of his nose. It would have been strange to do anything else. Words, words. Better than words.

At last, Levi dragged his hands back to his sides and Erwin let his fall. The phantom of a touch lingered, dancing on his skin. It was as if Levi could close his eyes and Erwin’s hand would return to his face. But in the end, none of that happened; in the end, Levi would stand, eyes open, and Erwin would stand, hand lame, and the two would wait, finally done wishing for a second chance, a second life, instead ruefully content with the one in front of them.

Erwin set his jaw. “Go kill the bastard.”

“For humanity.”

Even before he opened his mouth, Levi knew what Erwin wanted, what he was going to say. Some ghost tugged at his lips as Erwin gently shook his head. Always to have the last word.

“For me.”

**Author's Note:**

> (s)pain


End file.
